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This Adult Channel XXX film dates from 2003, which while not ancient in porn terms, still gives it a dated look. As the theme is quaint village life however, the slight datedness actually makes it more entertaining. Also we get to see some of the stars of today as they were when they first started in porn - such as a fresh-faced Donna Marie and a very slender Demetri. The action includes anal and DP and there are unusual sights such as a very plump girl and a full natural untrimmed pussy bush. All in all this film was a pleasant surprise from what I expected from the box cover.

There are six scenes, including 'Summer Fete', 'Can Buy Me Love' and 'Dose of Dairy'. Characters include staple village stereotypes such as the pub landlord, village gay, horny rich housewife, and ageing rock star. Each scene is just under 15 minutes, keeping the pace fast.

The first, '100 Per Cent British Beef', sees the village pub The Polished Cock employ a busty new barmaid (I've seen plenty of tits and pussy in this pub before - as it's actually The Halfway House in High Wycombe, a strip pub I danced at until it shut around two years ago). This time the nude female body is provided by blonde Summer, and stud services by Lee Henshaw, playing the village butcher. After being challenged "how well can you handle your meat?", and plenty of kissing and fondling, he bends Summer over the pool table and does her first in the pussy then the arse. He shoots copiously (definitely not the first man to want to do so in that venue).

Stand-out scenes are 'Dose of Dairy', 'Farmyard Practice' and 'Signed Sealed Delivered'. In the latter, ageing rock star Bryan Van Savage, played by Ian Tate, is stalked by mad fans Kat Varga and Donna Marie, who break into his house. They drug him and he wakes tied-up, Donna Marie telling him off for not responding to the fan-mail they sent. They proceed to tease him into a frenzy before presenting themselves to get fucked. Donna Marie shows she knew her tastes from the start of her porn career as she demands to be shagged up the arse.

In 'Farmyard Practice' a sick cow causes retired vet Mark Sloan to visit one of the farms. The farmer has left his attractive blonde daughter Caitlin to show the vet the problem. He's invited by Caitlin and her friend Bonnie Hart on a picnic to say thank you. The performers play it very tongue-in-cheek posh, with the girls cheeky and slightly clumsy, which actually has a very horny effect compared to slick porn perfection. They both look like pretty wholesome country girls, not porn stars, particularly Caitlin, who is plumper than most but oozing total sexuality thanks to that. Her tits are amazing. I'm surprised at quite how refreshing I found it to see a different body type to normal. Mark gets to lay back and enjoy it as the girls ride him in the sunshine, laughing with each other and finally kneeling together for their facefulls of cum.

'Dose of Dairy' sees bored rich housewife Mrs Johnson, played by Georgina Smith, seduce the new milkman, Demetri, one his first day on the job. She's been busy already with the butcher, Lee, who's still in the house and joins in the action. The guys take turns to part her hairy pussy lips for their big cocks, before spit-roasting then DPing her. It's no surprise these guys are still around now - they know how to fuck, upping the pace with Georgina's panting and shooting only several seconds apart over her upturned face and tits.

Elsewhere, in 'Can Buy Me Love' lottery millionairess Angie George helps student hairdresser Vicky clear some of her debts by paying her for sex. There's nothing ground breaking about this girl-girl but both the women are beautiful and take their time pleasuring each other, and it's hardly a chore to watch. And in 'Summer Fete', young Tony De Sergio is the Lord's heir seduced by the local beauty queen April.

This is like an early Relish film - hot British stars, in comedy British situations.

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